Cleaning is not my thing.
Some of the memories are!
The cleaning industry has provided me with a steady source of income for decades.
It provided me with my first ever pay packet.
I started my first job with Rankin's Cleaning Service (Now Golden Cleaning Service) in Melbourne, 1978, thereabouts.
In the late 70's, with a landline, a fax and or a telex machine and the Post Master General, businesses functioned quite well.
Could we ever return to the simplicity of life in the 60's and 70's? No internet, no mobile phones, real interactions with real people? Now that would be interesting. Has modern technology made things easier? I guess it depends on how you look at it.
I recall that Rankin's changed my name to "Richard Sparkham" It was on my first tax return! Interesting morphing from Hendrik van Spankeren... Chinese whispers in the Rankin's Cleaning Service office perhaps? It was easy enough to rectify the name blunder. Imagine the same error today? Almost impossible to fix, worse than a beetroot stain on a white cotton shirt.
I could write a book about my memories in the cleaning industry, perhaps I should add it to my list?
I'll share a few memorable moments here.
Wrong House.
Eddy and I arrived at a house to deliver a domestic cleaning service. The instructions on the 3 x 5 inch customer card file included, "enter via the sliding door to the living area". Simple enough.
The house was quite a mess, dusty, dog hair everywhere, no effort it seemed, had been made to tidy up a bit ahead of the cleaners arriving. Hmmm.
We used the phone in the house to call the office to clarify further instructions on the customer file card that didn't seem to make sense. It turned out we were in the wrong house! Typographical error on the file card with reference to the street number...
The neighbor enjoyed a free half house clean... (we left a note on the kitchen counter explaining what had occurred) Eddy and I went a few doors up the road to clean the right house.
Don't Play With Fridge Magnets.
Yes... Eddy and I.
Cleaning a house, inner city Melbourne.
For our own entertainment, we arranged fridge letter magnets to form 4 letter words... as many as we could from the limited number of magnets. We were quite pleased with the results. Childish, you could say.
A day later we were called in to the office.
We'd forgotten to scramble the words on the fridge before leaving the house. Apparently a 5 year old had had done a fair job of reading the words on the fridge out loud. Mum then saw what was on the fridge... Mum was not impressed. Neither was Mr. Rankin!
Long Hours that Left me Standing, Tired and Hungry
Long hours... Really long hours!
There were times 15 to 20 years ago, when I'd have to endure 18 hour shifts just to get through the scheduled cleaning work at various sites on time.
Linda and I were working our way through the day. I'd started at 2am after a mere 4 hours sleep. I was over tired and wanting a feed to give me the energy to keep going.
In the queue at Hungry Jacks, I actually fell asleep standing up. I was gone.
While asleep, my right hand found itself resting on the shoulder of the man standing in front of me, I guess to instinctively prevent a fall. I still don't quite know how I did this while sleeping!
Who was more startled?.. the man in front of me? Linda or myself? I have no idea.
After a most humble apology and, I hoped, plausible explanation to our fellow Hungry Jacks patron, we received our Double Mayo Whoppers and got out of there.
A few extra staff at the time would have been a good order.
Do you have an interesting or unforgettable sleep deprivation induced embarrassing situations you'd like to share?
Would you like to read more of mine? I have plenty!
Rik van Spankeren
Rik Write
Perth, Western Australia
Sea Change, The Middle Age Bonus
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